What to Do When Working with You Isn't Working for Me!
Question: "How does one shift out of separation-perception into the experience of team synergy?" Generally what separates us all is what we believe the rules should be and how inflexible we are about how they are upheld and interpreted. In the midst of discord, negativity and ambivalence is a great place to begin again where all the trouble originates: the Rules.
2 Team Building Activities for When Working with You Isn't Working for Me! - are in my GIFT 9-Weeks to a Make A Difference Year Training Manual for Teams wanting to experience the powerful and productive ease of Team Synergy we Begin with the End in Mind. Starting with Week 1: Community Building pg 13:
Activity 1: Re-Examining The Rules In this week's activity we introduce the important concept of 'Community Building' as the #1 foundational piece that generates self sustaining synergy. It's fascinating to watch participants discover that they can be responsible for the success of their entire community by creating team synergy through peer-to-peer, cooperative leading.
As you begin this, you may think that every adult should certainly know the meaning of "community" and the concept of "team" - but this exercise illustrates how many people actually operate in an autonomous way, which can be counterproductive for a team's ability to succeed at high-functioning levels with synergy and ease.
We all have our very own set of "rules" that, over a lifetime, we've learned to accept as "the way it's got to be."
Both spoken and unspoken, they build expectation into every level of communication, verbally and attitudinally.
These unexamined "rules" can be what fuels undercurrents of negativity, anger, resentment, projection, skepticism and inaccurate perceptions that keep a team from ALIGNING and experiencing the power of synergy, to get things done with amazing ease and speed!
As a group of intelligent adults begins to examine the validity of the "rules" in life we've come to accept - those rules, incidentally, that we beat ourselves up over, for believing that we are failing somehow by not being prefect in everything we do - we begin, together, to start accessing heart-opening compassion for ourselves ... and for the others on our team.
This is what begins to align us as human beings and, in that, we begin to experience the synergy that the spirit of harmony brings when we work toward an objective or goal.
Compassion is an old idea made new because science has finally caught up to ancient literature
and philosophy to prove that "the only way out" of resentment, anger, harmful or unskilled behavior than controlling. When this occurs, you learn to stop using fear and shame to modify unskillful behaviors and this, in turn, dramatically advances focus and productivity in the work place.
Activity 2: Community Rules go get it at my GIFT Download: makeadifference.com/Training
Nothing will improve in a positive direction until we learn - together - how to communicate instead of confront each other in angry, resentful ways.
- Excerpt from The Power of Compassion: 7 Ways to Make A Difference, by Mary Reynolds
Section 5: pg 82 - http://www.makeadifferencemovie.com/FlashBook/
To create alignment between yourself and an individual that is problematic for you, the very best place to begin is with Behavior Modification's #1 Rule: Before you can change anyone else you must first change yourself. So, what do you need to change? Your attitude!
Before you can change anyone else...
you must first change yourself.
How do you get to alignment? Get really honest with yourself, "What have I really decided about this person?" After you see how you've labeled them, simply decide to pull that attitude of yours back in to your own energy zone. Suspend judgment and you literally make an energetic safe space: an Attitude Free Zone - or AFZ as I like to call it - in an instant. When you do this, you are changing yourself and will powerfully and energetically influence what is happening between you and others involved in a productive direction.
If you don't like something, change it.
If you can't change it, change your attitude.
- Maya Angelou
Reaching out ...
Mary Robinson Reynolds, M.S
Mary Robinson Reynolds, M.S., Educational Psychologist, Author and Producer of the world renowned Internet videos, MakeADifferenceMovie.com and AcknowledgmentMovie.com - both amassing over 10 million views within a few short months of their releases - spent many years as a classroom teacher K-8 and then as a counselor K-12. She parlayed her phenomenal success with youth at-risk into her programs for business leaders, entrepreneurs and managers on how to be energetically effective in leading improvement in their organizations through the power of Team Synergy and MasterMinding. She has written eight books, developed UTrain&Coach programs that anyone can take into their place of work to build organization wide Team Synergy, and has presented to over 20,000 people in two year period in every major city in the U.S. To learn more go to: makeadifference.com
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